"Microplay has this game priced
at $9.95. Will you price match as yours is priced at $10?"
"I'd buy this game from you, but I've got it on hold from
Microplay. It's not nice to cancel an order when a store is
nice enough to hold a game for you."
"But you cancel games from me all the time. In fact,
you've done it so many times I won't order anything in for you
unless you prepay for it, and I won't hold anything for you
for longer than a day. Hell, you've cancelled more stuff than
you've ever picked up."
"Well, I don't want to make enemies."
"I see… Oh wait, no I don't."
At the store there are a couple
Virtual Boys set up to look all cool on top of a high display
case. And people being people, they just know if it's on
a six foot display case, not plugged in and no controller
around, it must be there for playing for free. And that sign
on the one facing forward that says "Warning! Do Not Play!"
means "Hook me up boy!"
So one day the Gord puts a sign in the Virtual Boy that was
spun around so the display was facing away from people, and he
stuffed a sign in there that read "Hey Jackass! How about you
show some manners and put me back!"
One day a guy brought the unit to the counter and asked what
the sign meant.
"Can I pay for a game with a
post-dated cheque? I have an account with your store."
(note: This was in May)
"Uhm.... well, what game and post dated till when?"
"Well, Final Fantasy IX and a memory card, and I would like to
post date it till October 15, as I get a GST cheque then."
"Let me think about that. No."
Rental Game Love Action!
"I'd like to trade these games
in please. What are they worth?"
"Given that they are my games that someone rented a
couple days back, I'd say they are worth nothing. I'm sure
the person who rented them will thank you for returning them
"I bought those games! They aren't yours!"
"Sir, not only are the games still in my rental cases,
but they are also labeled with security marker with my name
"How about $20?"
"How about I wish you a good day?"
"Give me back my games!"
"You're not keeping up here. They aren't your games to
"I'll phone the police."
"Fine. Go ahead. You can explain to them why you were
trying to sell me stolen games. Last I checked, selling
stolen merchandise that you know is stolen is illegal. You
must be new to this crime thing."
And buddy left, never to return.
"I'd like to buy that used
PlayStation with my credit please."
"Sir, you only have $14 credit, and used PlayStations are
"I have more than that!"
"Well, at your high point you did have $110 credit, but
you've spent It all on drinks and late fees. In fact,
you've still got two games out that combined you owe $42 in
late charges on."
"Well, I don't owe for those. I rented them for someone
"This would be an example of why you shouldn't rent for
friends. And since you rented them, you do owe for them."
"Just give me the PlayStation on account, and I'll pay for
"I'm sorry, but I'm not a bank nor a credit card agency.
Might I suggest you contact them."
"What's a PlayStation worth in
"Here you go."
Gord goes over to the monitor to hook up the PlayStation to
make sure it works.
"Uhm… what are you doing?"
"I'm going to just test it to make sure it works."
"You don't have to do that, it works just fine."
"Sir, the entire laser assembly is missing. This machine
cannot possibly play a game."
"So take off $5?"
"Perhaps I'm not making myself clear."
"So it's missing one part. I'm sure you have lots of extra
"Replacement laser assemblies are in very short supply.
Your machine is worth $20."
"You're a rip off!"
"As compared to someone who tries to trade in a broken